glassy blog post

15 Amazingly Awful Car Jokes

Kent Lansing
May 14, 2020

Laughter truly is the best medicine. Brighten up your day with some of our favorite, yet amazingly awful, family-friendly car jokes.

  1. What do you do with old German cars?

You take ‘em to the old Volk’s home.


  1. Bad news is your car is totaled. 

Good news is, after the wreck, your Audi is finally an innie.


  1. I stopped to pick up a hitchhiker.

Turns out he was just telling me that he approved of my driving.


  1. What kind of car do frogs prefer? 

A beetle!


  1. What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.


  1. What part of the car is the laziest? 

The wheels, because they are always tired.

  1. Why did the taxi driver lose his job? 

He kept driving his customers away!

  1. What happened when the frog’s car broke down? 

It got toad away!

  1. Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck? 

He wanted to bust a move.

  1. Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? 

He’s all right now.

  1. Where do dogs park their cars? 

In the barking lot.

  1. What has 10 letters and starts with G-A-S? 


  1. Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan.

  1. What kind of car does a Jedi drive? 

A Toy-Yoda.

  1. What did the traffic light say to the car? 

“Don’t look at me, I’m changing!”

Have some vehicle-related jokes better than these? Send them to [email protected] and you may just get featured in our next post!